My heart is heavy and I know that I have done it again... I know I have glorified self, not Him. I know that I have pointed people to me, not to Him. I know that what I said and did was stained by self. Even though I do not want anything of me and I want it to be all about Him, there are still moments when it is me and not Him shining through. I can identify so well with Paul that says: "For what I am doing, I do not understand. For what I will to do, that I do not practice; but what I hate, that I do." (Romans 7:15)
So I dream of a day when there will be nothing of me. When it will be all about Him. A day when I will be so hidden in Him, that He will shine through me in every single thing I do and say. When my words will be His words. When my actions will be His. When I will be only lifting people's thoughts higher and higher until they will rest only on the Lamb of God. When I will only be pointing them to the Lamb on the cross. When there will be no pride and selfishness left in my heart. The day when He will have 100% of my heart. When my eyes will look only to Him, not to me or to those around me. When my heart will learn His heartbeat. When my heart will break for the things that break His heart. When His tears will be my tears. When His passion will be my passion. When His agony will be my agony.
I dream of the day when the battle will be over, when I will be able to sing my heart out this song that I absolutely love:
"It
is finished, the battle is over
It is
finished, there'll be no more war
It is
finished, the end of the conflict
It is
finished and Jesus is Lord."
This are a few of the things that I have been dreaming about and praying for lately...
Amen!
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