Tuesday, November 11, 2008

First Step..

Today I have sent my passport to get the Guyanese visa. It's the first small step that I am taking in the process of getting ready once again for my departure and the only I can take right now. I'm just a helpless little girl who is waiting for her Father to show her what to do next and who is waiting on Him to provide for her. He has been always bringing me to the point where I have to wait on Him... I guess I still have to learn to trust that He will give me the resources I need in order to be able to leave. He has been faithful for the past three years and I know He is the same God yesterday, today and forever. If I look behind I can clearly see how faithful He was in taking care of my needs... So, why do I have to worry when I have already experienced so many times His care, when He send me what I needed at the right time? Why is it so hard at times to just trust without worrying a bit? Huh... our human nature!!! I cannot say I'm worrying right now but I have to admit I am wondering how long will He let me wait...

I wrestled with God last night...I was worrying about a certain issue and I was talking to Him asking Him why does it have to be so difficult at times... So we fought for some time and, in the end, He was victorious. He didn't promise me that He will solve the problem, He didn't say it will be easy. He just asked me to trust Him. So I gave up worrying.

Again and again, God is bringing me to situations where I see no way out and I just have to trust Him. I guess it's part of my intense course, part of the training He has for me.

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